Peace At Last in 2013.

I have been reading a book authored by Messianic Rabbi Kirt Schneider entitled "Awakening To Messiah".  As always in God-time, this book came not a moment too soon nor late.  I have been in the midst of a slow awakening and changing of my own.....being born again years ago, saved and AWARE of exactly what this means for the first time in life has been just critical in my development and in the place I find myself today, praise God.  However, I have still struggled with certain things.  While reading Rabbi Schneider's book a week ago, a simple and sudden revelation dawned on me that feels as if it has unlocked the next chapter of my life and I felt it urgent to share.  The fact that something so sensible had eluded me makes me wonder how many others have also missed this.  I have had an all-consuming desire my whole life that has been my focus, my drive, and my navigator.  Even after I was saved by the power of our Messiah, I still found myself longing and wondering why things weren't turning in the way I saw necessary for fulfillment.  I just KNEW that I KNEW that I KNEW that I was designed for a specific purpose and would stop at NOTHING until that plan had persevered and conquered all obstacles.  Well one day riding in the car with the concepts of Rabbi Schneider's book swirling in my brain, I had an epiphany.  I had bought into the system.  I had bought into......the world.  See, the world is broken and fallen by it's very nature.  It is filled with sin, and ruled by darkness.  This is a fact.  Our job as Christians is to shed light on the darkness and stay the course plotted by our beautiful and incomparable Savior, Jesus.  I thought my life was mine to do with as I pleased[within reason of course]and to be enjoyed as long as I loved the Lord.  I was taught and bought ideas like:

*life is what you make it
*all things are possible
*anything I want can be attained
*reach for your dreams
*be a man
*provide provide provide for your family
*make as much money as you can no matter how much time and effort it takes
*the early bird catches the worm

I had trained and retrained my brain to work, seek, figure out, search, and chase after the world's view of what is successful.  I believe this is a mind frame that most modern men share, because we are lead to live this way by society and culture.  Here is the problem - all of the things listed above put the power of your life, your accomplishments, and your future in YOUR hands.  I suddenly realized I have not been letting God be God.  He created me[and you]for companionship.......we were breathed to life out of His sheer passion and love.  He created us to need Him.  All he asks in return, is that we love Him back and look to Him in all things as our Father.  He wants intimacy.  

I have come to realize much in a short week and could go on and on and on, but the crux of all of this is that He designed me[and you!]with a purpose and a plan in mind.  HE already has my life and my future in His hands, with a wonderful and prosperous outcome[He promises and guarantee's it!].  All I need to do, is GIVE HIM BACK THE LIFE HE GAVE ME.  Instead of pushing MY agenda and plans and schemes, I need to bury my stupid suffering selfishness and get on my knees in prayer.  I need to recommit my love for Him, my reliance on Him, and my belief in His promise to me.  Since discovering what I frankly should have already known[thank God I've discovered it now...], I have for the first time in my whole entire life found a peace within.  I know now that my plans for myself may never come to fruition, and that is okay.  I don't need to chase the wind any longer, and I don't need to work myself to the bone grinding my life into the ground - I need to find a quiet place.  I need to get on my knees.  I need to thank God for His Son, and the breath I breath, and my beautiful family, and the love in my heart, and the incredible creations he has bestowed upon the earth for my human eyes to  fall upon while I am here.  Then, I need to ask HIM what to do today.  I need to lean on Him expectantly.  I need to get real, and give up my control.  I need to give it ALL to Him if we are gonna really do this........I need to live for HIM.  That was the whole reason for my existence in the first place........to live to glorify Him.  If I accomplish much of own accord and by the sweat of my brow, who will I say has done these great things?  Me.  However, if I allow myself to be a humble servant of the Almighty God who can do far greater things than I could EVER fathom, then who's name shall I shout from the mountain tops when miracles are seen and performed?  Abba Father.  From this day forth, I will learn to become what I never quite understood.....a living sacrifice.  Eternity with Jesus is my new goal.  God's favor is my new drive.  Casting out the world's view of who am I and who I should be to make room for the Holy Spirit to live and work though and in me is my new purpose.  I don't want the glory of this world any more......I don't deserve it.  I want all the world to know the love and power in store for all of us in the mighty and strong name of Jesus Christ.  This is a brand new year, and He is mercifully rebuilding me from the ground up.........I don't have a new year's resolution, I have a new year's revelation.